Pod People – (303) 6. Trace Beaulieu, Agent for H.A.R.M. The movie is just dreadful, and the characters (especially our protagonist wizard and his sour-faced, bowl-cutted boy, Tyor) are excruciating to listen to, which puts Wizards II in a tie with Carnival Magic for the most painful of the films watched in season 11, albeit for very different reasons. The Mads are ... See full summary ». Gamera vs. Guiron (312) - 33 Originally produced as a TV pilot/made-for-TV movie called The Stranger in 1973, it was never picked up into a full series, and follows an astronaut who crash-lands on a mirror-image version of Earth hidden on the far side of the Sun, which is run by a totalitarian government. Who is the hooded figure that wants Bobo's soul? The medieval adventures of a sardonic hero, on a quest for three magical stones, who battles the evil sorcerer Troxartes, ruler of Southland. The Killer Shrews – (407) 43. These people were simply not attempting to earnestly make a good movie that could stand on its own merits; they were trying to make a schlocky, bad-on-purpose farce and cash in on the fact that the first film somehow recouped its costs on VHS. The Mole People – (803) 67. A high school dweeb plans a heist to win the favor of a pretty classmate. Jim Mallon, Are you ready? The bots obsess over their newfound devotion to a character in the film. If only it wasn’t followed by Swamp Diamonds. Director: Mike explains the honor system to the Bots and Tom "scats" until Mike and Crow can't take it anymore. Comedy, Sci-Fi, Joel and the Bots watch a second segment from an early episode of General Hospital (1963) before watching a wannabe singer try to break free from his hoodlum friends in The Beatniks (1960).... See full summary », Director: Girl in Gold Boots, The (1002) - 46 To get you ready for the MST3K revival, here are the top 100 Mystery Science Theater 3000 episodes of all time, as voted on by the fans! named “Juanito” attempting to survive the wrath of the scorpions. He performs experiments on intruders and feeds his enemies to a pond-dwelling octopus. All I can say is: “Flag on the moon. The story, on the other hand, is instantly forgettable—scientists in the desert, and an annoying kid (why is there always a kid in these movies?) Movie pain meter: High Best riff: Joel, as a girl nails up animal cut-outs to the wal: “Kay’s worked on the kill floor; she knows where to deliver the blow.”. First aired episode. Kinga and Max pitch several money-making ideas to big-time space venture capitalist Freak Masterstroke. Michael J. Nelson, Fugitive Alien – (310), 31. Show 517: Beginning Of The End (season five, episode 17)As hosting duties passed from Hodgson to head writer Mike Nelson, it took a few episodes for the show to regain its footing. Crimefighter Batwoman and her loyal young female assistants battle villains Ratfink and Professor Neon.The 1951 short chronicles the downfall of a high school student caught copying his test answers from another student. Michael J. Nelson He projects himself a rendition of Casablanca, and ends up leading a revolution. 93 min Godzilla Vs. Pretty solid all-around for a season 1 episode, Black Scorpion feels pretty familiar in the “giant, irradiated (in this case prehistoric) insect” subset of ‘50s monster movies. Squirm – (1012) 59. Touch of Satan, The (908) - 24 A woman is forced to slave away, while a young prince with the head of a bear must perform a good deed to reverse the curse. Drifter Bix Dugan, traveling with rich-kid runaway Danny, becomes involved with a small-town waitress. Jim Mallon, Plus: More Commando Cody. Show 1001: Soultaker (season 10, episode one)Werewolf’s fount of spiritual hoodoo, Joe Estevez, makes his second MST3K appearance in Soultaker, playing an emissary of The Angel of Death hunting four of MST3K’s favorite objects of ridicule: numbskull teenagers. This one is about a group of prison escapees and an undercover cop, searching for a secret stash of, well … swamp diamonds. Movie pain meter: Extreme Best riff: “I’ll take ‘To Be’ for $500, Alex.”. Being From Another Planet is a very painful film indeed; just outside the “extreme” movie pain level. 10 essential MST3K episodes. It’s ugly, greasy and deeply unlikable on all fronts, the story of a strange carnival attended by annoying people who get hypnotized and set loose on the world. The movie itself is a winning introduction to the wild world of the series’ “Russo-Finnish saga,” a colorful, poorly dubbed bouillabaisse of European folklore that induces a hilarious state of whimsy-fatigue in Mike and the Bots. In an Orwellian future, a corporate employee discovers forbidden films inside the computers. A Texas sheriff goes to Malta in pursuit of the criminal that killed his partner. (At the request of Sci-Fi Channel, the interstitial “host segments” from the show’s eighth season take on a stronger sense of continuity from episode to episode—a conceit that didn’t recur for seasons nine and 10.) Future War (1004) - 39 The 400-year-old severed head of a devil-worshiper hypnotizes several people at a ranch in order to be reunited with his body.First appearance of Observer. Even solid riffing can’t compete with this kind of non-entertaining awfulness. Rocky Jones tries to save two worlds from collision, despite the self-defeating efforts of Cleolanta.In the third General Hospital short, Dr. A band of knights seek to defeat a malevolent ruler by locating a trove of magical inventions. He is then captured and brought back to the United States. 1. Lost Continent – (208) 57. Jonah introduces a series of new robots to Tom and Crow, with unexpected results. Special guest stars Bill Corbett, Kevin Murphy and Mary Jo Pehl. That’s almost SIX TIMES longer than watching the six seasons of Game of Thrones from start to finish. In the 1951 short, four young women learn the value of home economics degrees. | Jonah introduces a series of new robots to Tom and Crow, with unexpected results. Lost Continent (208) - 56 It’s a tale of kids gone astray, and one with a promising music career that gets derailed when a member of his gang commits a crime of passion. But Joel/Mike is one of those Beatles/Stones things where you can’t go wrong either way, so you should really just relax. (815) - 71 Todd Ziegler Prince of Space (816) - 15 A ponderous Japanese superhero film about alien invaders, it just melts your brain by refusing to get on with it, to the point that Servo is left sobbing and pleading for an end to it and Mike attempts to flee the theater despite a lack of oxygen in the rest of the ship. Secret Agent Super Dragon (504) - 77 The bots subject Jonah to a herculean trial as the defendant in “Court of Axe Appeal.” When Jonah introduces another new bot, M. Waverly, Tom and Crow make their feelings known. A retired race car driver, talked into going undercover by the police, joins a biker gang and must serve as the getaway car driver. 1104 - Avalanche. Rocky Jones tries to save two worlds from collision, despite the self-defeating efforts of Cleolanta. Killer bees terrify a remote English island while a bowler hatted guy appears where he's least expected. | | An astronaut survives the crash of his capsule, only to learn he has been impregnated by an alien. Gamera vs. Barugon (304) - 90 If you watch these 10, you’ll have a better idea of what that series was about, without having to watch the whole thing. A government researcher experiments with radioactive materials to boost crop production, and inadvertently creates a hungry army of giant grasshoppers. The Crawling Eye – (101) 83. Mary Jo Pehl, This week's film is a deep sci-fi story about ants that leaves Crow wishing he'd brought a pair of boots into the theater. The Essential DanMachi Moments. Jim Mallon, First appearance of Frank Conniff as TV's Frank. All in all, we’re getting into better episodes of MST3k at this point in the ranking, and from about this point onward they’re episodes I wouldn’t mind watching at least one more time. The Giant Spider Invasion – (810) 29. Monster A-Go-Go (421) - 40 That’s fine. It simply comes down to selecting the right episodes with which to do so. A couple of slackers stumble across a cult of monsters at an early 1960s carnival. Together they sing the hit song, “Our Love Is On Wings (You Can’t See).” 1105 - The Beast of Hollow Mountain. Overall, though, this episode is simply more forgettable than it is painful. The cast simply seems baffled by what they’re seeing. So I’ve combed through their history to uncover what I believe are the 12 funniest, weirdest, and just overall best episodes of MST3K ever made. (“Just get a giant screen door!”), Show 622: Angels Revenge (season six, episode 22)And yet Best Brains rarely took the easy way out with a film; a lesser series might lean on leering gags for this jiggly Charlie’s Angels rip-off, but the jokes in Show 622 redirect the lurid, grindhouse-angling aspects of Angels Revenge back at the movie. Unsurprisingly, the little-seen Season One had the fewest entries (3) as it was before the show had really found its feet, while the excellent Season Three tops the list with a whopping 16 of its 24 installments making the list. Now, just a quick look at this by the numbers. Though the onscreen talent might change throughout the 10 episodes below (which should be considered an extension of the selections made for the Gateways To Geekery feature), the premise remains brilliantly, unobtrusively simple: A human host and his robot companions watch and ridicule the worst movies ever made, as sent to them by a team of mad scientists. Attack Of The Eye Creatures – (418) 58. Jim Mallon, Escape 2000 – (705) 89. Stars: MST3K: The Best Horror Episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000 Features From teenage werewolves to...regular werewolves, here are some prime Mystery Science Theater 3000 episodes for Halloween. Plus: Commando Cody. Movie pain meter: Medium Best riff: “She enters the scene like a parade float.”. Nordic fantasy tale, based loosely on the Kalevala, about a wicked witch's schemes to get, and later regain, a magic mill. The Girl in Gold Boots – (1002) 47. ), there’s some glimmers of later-season MST3k goodness in there.

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